My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Also, beer. Big fan.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
