Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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