spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
