4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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