Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
