Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Randomize
