we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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