2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Randomize