I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
