North Korea, Best Korea!
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
