I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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