is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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