my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
