I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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