I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
