remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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