Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Randomize
