it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I have aggressive nipples.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Randomize
