it was like eating out sand paper
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
