Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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