she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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