I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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