Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
