If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
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