They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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