I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
