Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Randomize
