Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
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