There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Randomize
