I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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