dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
