there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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