I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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