Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
