She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
