I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
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