So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
false alarm. still invincible.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
