We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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