found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
