Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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