i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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