she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
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