If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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