now i know why i became what i already was.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
