Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
