problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I am naked and annoyed.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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