Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
