She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize