dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Mom said you looked used
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Randomize
