Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Randomize
